I’m not a team player- at least, not in an RPG. I tend to play characters that have a “hidden agenda”, who like to work behind the scenes, and who are tight-lipped about their motivations.
TheDude noted that I tend to be happiest in games with lots of overlying themes, where I can blend into the background and “do my own thing” without a lot of attention being directed at me or my character. Specific types of games that he mentioned were conspiracy, gritty future, cyber, dark, or some variation of those.
I do enjoy those types of games quite a lot, but I also love the “four color” superhero type of game. My subtle manipulative obscura don’t really fit into the “cape” types well, and as a result, I have struggled while playing in those games.
I knew that playing in the Superhero games I like so much was a struggle, but I hadn’t quite connected why until TheDude helped point out the obvious to me. Superhero games require a lot of openness, sharing of information and implicit trust that are completely contrary to the “under the radar” way I like to operate.
Some of the most challenging and fun roleplaying I’ve done has been when my character has been trying to keep a separate life, but has been forced into a central role despite all protests and lack of qualifications for the position.
I love these sessions, where I’m forced to work harder to try to cover my tracks, but be part of something bigger as well. I love the duality of “not too much” information, but “not too little”, either.
It was with that thought process that I began to believe that I might be a good GM after all, despite all my trepidations and questions of confidence. The question began to develop in my head –
“How do I transition from a player to a GM?”
I love sharing stories and developing ideas. I love writing and telling stories, and developing great depth. I find bringing compelling characters and rationale for actions to be well worth the effort.
Now, how to bring that out in others?
But it slowly started to roll into my thoughts, in small whispers and snippets of ideas; I already do.
I excel at making others look good. I’m absolutely best when helping others bring out whatever works of art, creations of excellence and genuine inspirations might lie inside them. I’m an excellent muse, the wind that pushes others into greatness.
I’m interested in learning how to “organize people” for some of my professional goals. The ability to get 6-8 people to follow direction, cooperate and perform team activities for 4 hours at a time could be a great asset in some of the fields for which I have interest.
If I could work on those management skills (which need at least some development) while doing some of the things I am really good at, I might have a chance as a GM. Combining my natural talents, best abilities and areas for growth in a hobby oriented situation seems like a great way to achieve the best of both worlds- and maybe have some fun, too.
Uh, did I mention I like to overthink things, as well?